Walking the path of Lord Buddha!

For the first time, I'm actually reading my first ever book of Lord Buddha. I'm half way done and can't wait to finish all those 600 pages. I'm looking forward to blog my opinion on it. I'm amazed at the fact that most of the things that I've learned from this book had never been taught in our school or @ home. Gee point to be noted.
:p

Bonding (Kismat Connection)

Oh Lord, been so busy that I didn't even get to start the blog that I really want to write. Any how, here I'm back with full charged and sipping my favorite drink strawberry steamer. Sometimes I just feel so bad over the emotional inequality that exist within us human being. I feel this way specially after completing my daily duty @ work. Most of time, I even make sure I do my homework before I go to bed as well, promising myself tomorrow I will give my 100% effort to bring 'SMILE' on those patients who I've zero connection. Is it really that hard to bring smile on someone's face? Or is it really that hard to 'LIKE' someone? Eventually, the only key to bring smile on someone's face is to be able to like that person at first place. All of sudden I found my answer! Without any (kismat connection) there's no way we can fake our feelings to strangers. But then, its always a win win to say hello to your ex boyfriends and not be stranger. WHY? It's a very long story, something so sweet and special. I will sum it up in short cut.
Then,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
My first year in college, I met the love of my life @ (UFM) University Of Minnesota state college. Of course during my very first time night out with my friends. I was totally( bacha on top of being complete kacha) as well. My parents had never allowed me to be close friends with anyone else besides my very own best friend forever since kid. Both of us know very little about outside world though we know so much about each others, so that makes us even more kacha. But as time pass, I've been seeing him for many many months. Those were the times, when I know nothing about this so called 4 famous word: LOVE~ The only reason I'm seeing him is because everybody around me has someone and therefor, I should be with someone as well. How stupid is that? But mind yeah..............yet I've never crossed my laxman rekha. Ting! Soon after, the relationship has come to an end due to my naive & not so nice behaviors. At that time I did not know why it had ended up like that but for some reason there was no spark between us at all.  I was not at all 'sweet' enough to let him hold my hand even after his countless try....bechara. Months and months had pass, he would come over my class to teach me chemistry, we would go for cinema, fancy restaurant, still there was no luck between us. But one time this lavishing dating period had ended up with big fight and we broke up just like any normal couple. But the sad news here is our love story ended before even there is( love @ first sigh) ; on top of that we know nothing of each other.  Can anything be worst then that? The last conversation that we had on phone was way too personal and ugly there for better not disclose it. Bottom line all I can say is we both are acting and fighting like a siblings. Exchanging bad words to each other without any means. At that time, it sure feels great to vent out and having something mean to say back to him without knowing in a year or so that feeling will no longer be the same. WHY?

To be continue...........................
After a years, one fine day I spot him again on the list of people who've visited my personal page. Even though we never had the so call social network while we were dating. I had made that page after our break up and yet he had manage to find me again in the so called world of social network, and no it wasn't even the famous facebook network, it was something else, the good old hi5. The very first time when I saw him on there, for no reason it just brought smile on my face and I just wanted to say hi/bye. But kismate had planned something more (special) then that and fortunately it gave me the best days of my life so far. He has made such a great impact in my life, specially my social life. He even topped my (smart mother) in many many ways. At times, even made her jealous and insecure of loosing me as well.
You'll always remain special in my heart! Whoever said love sucks...........go to hell! These are some of the amusing mails that he sent me when first time we are "really getting to know each other & madly falling in love." I'll copy and paste it below. Enjoy!!! PS- I asked someone very much elder to me if its ok to hold on to the memories of our loved ones and she said "approved" its ok. Infect, she still has all the letter of her sweet 16 beloved even though she's been married to someone else for 50 plus years. And it made me feel less guilty to do this so. After all, these are part of our lives, specially those innocent times that we had spent under the sun for years and years were just so precious.

To:    ShyAngel
Subject:    RE:Hi
Date:    Jun 28, 2007 11:40 PM
You impressed me. I was totally shocked with this message. I just happened to see ur profile and human curiosity dragged me in. 

This shows you have matured quite a bit and I am not even close to you. I personally would had never initiated a convo coz I have high ego which is never good. I agree with you, I think we both were amateurs then. It was like 3 years ago....right 

I believe everything happens for a reason and there might be a reason behind this too. About me I am doing good, almost done with my grad school and about to make a new carrer move. 

How are thing with ya? 

Take care 
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To:    ShyAngel
Subject:    RE: RE: RE:Hi
Date:    Jul 4, 2007 3:28 PM
Hi 
So u know what I don't get ur nick name here...It doesn't fit you. So what is the mature girl upto these days. 

I feel like we have lot of things to catch up and I am getting tired of typing..and my fingers are sour from typing this message..so what do u suggest... 

PS- Added you 
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To:    ShyAngel
Subject:    RE: RE: Hmmm
Date:    Jul 16, 2007 12:46 AM
I am not sure what was mean but it ...wasn't the intention....typed communication can be confusing at times as it lacks expression.
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To:    ShyAngel
Subject:    RE: RE: RE: RE: Hmmm
Date:    Jul 16, 2007 7:14 PM
Okie....lesson learned...playfull teasing is bad... ---
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To:    ShyAngel
Subject:    RE: Hello ji!
Date:    Aug 15, 2007 12:43 PM
Hi beautifull 
Whats up!!! 
How r u? Its been long time since I saw u or say we have not seen each other. so why dont we make a plan and spend some time together... may be coffee or movie or hey party ya party will be good idea . so wt r u doing next saturday...lets enter into our friendship world with a good celebration on saturday. 
so tell me r u free that day....if not we can plan some thing as u say. 
reply soon and ya keep smiling ... hey did I ever said that u have very cute smile... I know u must be thinking I m flirting... but its truth and no one can change the truth...ya promiseeeeeeeeeeeeee. believe me...anyways 
take care 
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To:    ShyAngel
Subject:    RE: Hi
Date:    Aug 29, 2007 12:32 AM
Same here...it was nice talking to u too, same soothing voice no change....
Talk to u soon 
Keep Smiling 
(__________)
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This was the beginning of our Solasal ki tazataza pyar<3 after long wait! Ahkar isaay bakwan ki deya howa pyar ki kismat connection naye khai thi tho kya khai thi?
:-)